Learning to live beyond success and failures

The notions of ' success' and 'failure' are basically illusions of locations created by a society at a given point in time. What matters is not necessarily the destination, but the wonders of travelling life-and travelers of life. ' Success' and 'failures' are illusions of self, created by delusions of the society at a given point in time.

What matters is whether we make an effort to go beyond the 'comfort zone' of predictability as often imposed on us by the institutions and society. What matters is whether we make an effort to constantly explore, learn, unlearn and learn again- by living ; wonder about our own life and other expressions of the living. What matters is whether we chose to live beyond the compulsions of livelihood. Whether life takes precedence over living and living takes precedence over livelihood.

We are often forced to become prisoners of livelihood! And sometime prisoners of our own self and dreams. It is safer to be in the prisons of self and imprison your dreams- and then feel 'successful' or 'failure', being in conformity with the prisons of self we create and the bigger prison of life that society impose on us.

That is why we want to 'be free' but can't afford to enjoy the freedom. Because freedom can be scary for many. We want freedom, though we are too scared of freedom as it takes you to the paths of anarchic uncertainties and wonders of life. We are too scared to move in to uncharted pathways as we fear that we lose our way in the jungles of life. What matters is whether you can afford to be a nomad in life- as there are uncertainties at every turn of the pathways of life. Many may not choose uncharted pathways as the travel can consume you or with the real possibilities of losing the path and drifting without a sense of direction.

What matters more is the life before death and not the life after the death We don't choose our own names; we don't choose our religions; we don't even choose our nations. We don't even choose our gender. They all choose us to draft us in to conformed roles of expectations- and these expectations make false sense of 'failure' or 'success'.

Ask a farmer what is 'success' or 'failure'. Ask a human beings living in tribal commune; he/or she may not understand the notions of 'success' or 'failure'. Of course, a farmer gets happy when the sapling he/she plants blooms or become fruitful. He/she may feel sad when the sapling gets destroyed by nature or by some other means. A young tribal boy may feel very happy when he climbs a tall tree to fetch honey or fruits. But he may not call it 'success'. When one begins to understand the flow and waves of life in a big canvass through the ages, success or failure are basically illusions created by society at a given point in time.

We live by dreams and death. We live by hope and fear. We live by yearning for freedom and learning to managing emotions of fear of death. Everyone tries to overcome death by subversive means of creativity. Some people create. Most pro-create and give their names to their kids

One of the reasons that I love few unusual friends is that they somehow discovered that the notions of 'success' and 'failure' etc are basically illusions. I also feel connected with them due to their sense of experimenting with life, and their sense of wonder and beauty. They live creatively. There are many such nomads of life. But here I only mention four such people.

My friend Shaji Thomas whom I discovered in the Amazon is such a rare breed of a nomad. From Ramapuram in Palai, he went all the way to Amazon forests to understand and live with millions of expressions of life in the Amazon forests. He was not seeking a career option. He studied theology, moved to anthropology. Learned Yoga. Went Sao Polo- to work in the slums, become trade union activists- and then moved on to Amazon as he dreamt of going to Amazon when he was in class 9 in his villge, Rampuram.

He and his beautiful wife Eli took us for an unforgettable boat ride in the Amazon river- making us feel the winds of the river and fragrance of the flowers of the forests , and feeding us lunch in beautiful village of Eli. The villagers loved the guests from Belam. Though I know Shaji as an activist, when I learned that he makes a living by sharing yoga with others, I knew he was different.

Another person who managed to go beyond this notion of success and failure is my dear friend Murali Vettath. Murali Vettath and I discovered on facebook and it all began with a fight about the idea of international development in the inbox. I liked the irreverence in him. Then he asked whether Paul Zachariah was my friend .And then we ended up as good friends as he often called me from London when I was feeling the winter in Oslo. I visited him many times in London- and he made excellent fish curry and tapioca for me; and when we meet we discuss everything under the sun; and then I visited his beautiful house at Irinjalakkuda; he was as relaxed as ever and as we walked to the beautiful pond he made near his home in Kerala. Then we walked for lunch to a nearby canteen , I knew this guy is an unusual one;-) . I love the nomad in Murali- as he is passionate as well as detached about life; but living every moment passionately. He made a film. He ran a restaurant in London. He hosts writers, and stars. He remains an activist- and active in whatever he does; or as a writer or the editor of Nava Malayali.
But he keeps laughing at himself and life itself. Murali is fine in Havana, Tokyo, London or Irinjallakkuda or the Bombay flat in Trivandrum. He is fine with local guy and a global guy. He is fine with Mammootty and little kid on the street. He is irreverent about him and others.
When we meet it is like meeting of two nomads in some junctions of life.

I love the nomad in Paul Zacharia too. He not only can express creatively- but what is more important is that his life is an art as he too lives creatively- with a sense of wonder and excitement. I have seen this when I spent time with him in Kho Samui,- a beautiful island in Thailand or when I wondered in a swimming pool, at our apartment in Bangkok, whether he could write a novel in English- and he did write the novel. After many years, when he read the first chapter of his novel to a group of friends in Oslo, I felt happy. When we, along with another nomad, Gafoor, discovered the northern Norway and the long drive to northern most city of Sweden, we were watching sky and clouds, sensed the life within and beyond. it is the sheer sense of wonder that excited all of us and united us in our travels.

What is common in all of them is they keep wondering about the world, they get excited by little happiness - and they have all gone beyond the bullshit of 'success' and 'failure'. They are travelers of life on this planet. They are nomads of life. I too am a nomad.